Sighting

more than fifteen years since you went silent on me, after so many millions of words. i dont blame you, but I do blame you, if that makes any gentle sense. i’ll never believe loving you was wrong. we were both at fault.  some days, i manage to forget for the better part of the day, sometimes for a week. and then there you are again, some turn of phrase, the voice at my ear, making me better and not so alone. i’m fine. i’ve managed more than well enough. but the missing you, china—it’s worse than toothache.

we had our reward already long ago